EXCUSE NOTES

These are actual excuse notes from parents for their kids (including original spelling):

- Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

- My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

- Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

- Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

- Excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of tree and misplaced his hip.

- John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

- Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

- Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.

- Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

- Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

- Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.

- Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.